Hook, Line, and Serpent

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I’ve noticed an unfortunate trend creeping into even the more conservative Christian circles these days.  Once reviled as a widely-accepted enemy of Christianity, immodesty seems to be rearing her ugly head again. We as men have to think about these things as we lead our families – how we guide our wives and daughters in Christ-like purity.

As with many things, the history of this in the church realm is often a pendulum swing. For a few years, great emphasis will be placed on being a distinct and separate light, separate from the ensnarements of the world. Then someone starts questioning whether or not we’re being legalistic, and before you know it, the pendulum has swung to the opposite side again, with the young girls of the church being externally (and all too often, as a consequence, internally) no different from the world that rejects Him. Don't get me wrong, fashion and immodesty are two different things.  The unfortunate part is that, generally speaking, what the world defines as fashionable usually involves immodesty. To quote an old Carmen song, "I've seen more cotton in an aspirin bottle!"

A very good friend and mentor once recently said of immodest women: “They are either thinking evil, or they aren’t thinking, and both are evil.” Basically, to break that down, they are either (a) seeking to ensnare men by using their sexuality to entice and draw away the attentions of men to what should be reserved only for her husband (present or future), or (b) they are giving no thought to the way they dress and act, which is entirely contrary to the way Paul instructs in 1 Timothy 2:9-10.

This fight is extremely personal to me, for a number of reasons.  Mainly, I once struggled with pornography, but was freed from it by the grace of God.  And thus it causes me no end of grief to see some of the things young Christian girls wear of late, and even flagrantly post pictures of themselves in… in every form imaginable. They are the very types of things and pictures I would once seek out in the depth of my sick and depraved sin to lust after. It grieves me, and upon more recent encounters with such things, has made me angry in a way I didn’t really understand – until I realized that it was because these very images that these Christian girls are projecting of themselves are the very things I was rescued from. I’ve left those sins far behind me, by the grace of God alone, and now those who claim to be my sisters in Christ are flaunting their bodies in the same way the unbelievers do.

I’ve heard the argument of “it’s not the woman’s fault if the man struggles with lust” more times than I care to remember.  Is a woman guilty of a man’s lust? No, he gets his own blame. But has an immodest woman “pushed/crossed the boundaries” or is she causing her brothers to stumble into sin by her own actions?  Quite certainly.  In the same way that a man must be careful with his words in order to keep a woman from lusting emotionally. We have responsibilities to guard our brothers' and sisters' hearts (Gal 6:1-2).  Each gender struggles with its own particular temptations. Immodesty can be a male thing too, though usually in an emotional sense rather than a physical sense. 

For a man, his struggles are generally with the eyes.  God made a man to react to the beauty of a woman. In His design, He made a man to be able to be satisfied in gazing on his wife (Prov 5:18-19), and there's no denying that physical attraction plays a role in causing a man to pursue a woman, even in a chaste relationship. But even though most Christian girls will still say they are saving their bodies for the marriage bed, by dressing immodestly they have sent a signal to the world that contradicts such an aspiration. It says, "I'm choosing not to sin, but boy do I sure want to!" They have thrown their bodies out for the world to see.  And bear in mind that immodesty isn't just the amount of skin showing, it's how a lady presents her body.  She can be fully covered and still be showing things that no one but her husband should see.

There's many reasons a woman might want the licentious attention that any type of immodesty brings: desire for emotional intimacy, to feel "loved," and ultimately, to gain control. So what message does immodesty send? More directly for a professing Christian woman, how is she representing the body of Christ if the non-verbal message being sent with the attire is that there is more care for the attention of the world, the attention of the lustful eyes of a man, or the acceptance of other women, than there is care for the desires of Christ? Further, is that her idea of “beauty?” If so, then there is a serious spiritual deficit, if she defines beauty not by what Christ says it is (1 Peter 3:3-5, Titus 2:4-5), but by what the world says it is.  

For decades now, the secular world has taught that a woman can and should use her sexuality as a manipulative tool to coerce men's actions. I plead with my sisters in Christ not to fall for this lie, even as I watch many of them fall prey to it.  We have to lead the way as men. We must hold ourselves to seeking Christ in all areas of purity, and our beloved women in the ways of Christ-honoring purity as well. Without that, so many Christian girls and women will once again bite the apple... hook, line, and serpent... and brazenly, unabashedly expose their bodies for the world to see.
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